make it simple

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Qeen Jamil(:
Brunei in my blood.
musically inclined.
photography in heart.
and crayons in my toolbox.
ipod in speakers in MAXIMUM.
shop-a-holic to the max.
no more no less.
cellphone shut & silent mode.
guitars down piano on headphone.
wardrobe in green and purple.
written over 21 application forms and yet, JOBLESS?
addicted to cherry pies and vanilla.
does everything in last minute,
nut manages things in time
grade doesn't go lower than 3.8GPA.
i'm not that smart, i have sources.
i don't have label.
cause i'm sort of everything.

i'm a member of
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sweet escapes <3

Peejuhilahoe ♥
abangwehkambang`
abang zal`
abiem putra`
adam faii`
adebeb`
afeescenekitty`
afiq fadilah`
afiq ruzaini`
aish ayid`
akiemiezu`
alai`
aniz mazelan`
ann shukri`
asfeeqeen ♥
b.k.sit
danial`
dillah`
ebaporeba`
eefsbaybay ♥
eez md lee`
eqah HM`
erna`
ess s hassan`
farah d`
fija rule`
G7`
hidayah arriffin`
HIPhotographers`
ikhwan`
im basirah`
izadwen`
izuddin rousali`
jush mc cortney`
kaka dd`
kaka eamy`
karokamaz`
kembara santai`
la belle franc`
lynn oh lynn`
maajidah mahmud`
mally-boo`
nisa`
norm`
oliver`
omgz`
ongie`
pijj`
pjal8`
qah kahar`
qasrina`
reena`
rynehh`
sakina`
salurut manis`
sash J`
smpihm aha united`
stranges world`
tina`
the hate column`
vee ismail`
wana`
ween`
ween`
wiwi`
xanabioticx`
yuyu`
zee`
zirah`
zrrierockstar`
zyma hamdan`


horrible pasts

November 2008
December 2008
January 2009
February 2009
March 2009
April 2009
May 2009
June 2009
July 2009

craps!


credits

Designed by KraUjaGysLea: x x x x x
Photo source: x
Host: x x




i don't want to fall back on my face again



I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry

I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry

I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry

I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry

I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry

I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry

I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry

I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry

I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry

I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry

I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry

I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry

I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry

I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry

I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry

I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry I’m Sorry



i'm Emaroartha's ♥ 2:29 PM



Da double dee double di
My lips like sugar
This candy got you sprung
So call me your sugar
You love you some
I'm sweet like
Da double dee double di
Sugar

So your love with the lips, put a bug in the ear tone.
You have my kiss, it's an emergency.
Spit sprung for the taste, addicted to my gloss.
I’m your little mistletoe
I’ll do that favor

Pretty much, I’m giving you a sugar rush.
Giving you high blood pressure when I blush.
Lips feel soft as a feather when we touch,




I’m sorry I did my mistake again last night,

Everything’s going to be alright.

I love you


i'm Emaroartha's ♥ 12:42 PM



I found this in my laptop’s documents punya gambar punya isinya! I was like, lama sudah ni gambar ah last year I guess? Or awal tahun ani. Eh last year kali HAHA dumb-ass.



i'm Emaroartha's ♥ 12:31 PM

endless

-5:18pm-

Qeen: you, me ke Gadong ah?

Paes: bah enjoy.

Qeen: you?

Paes: I think I can’t make it, you saja

Qeen: me mahu jalan sama you tssk!

Paes: I’ll try

Qeen: try ah?



-8.15pm-

Paes: you, me sampai sudah

Qeen: karang me message mun me sampai, you?

Paes: now? Seorang

*Farid text*

Farid: Qeen, mana Paes?

Qeen: Gadong

Farid: oh

Qeen: kami Gadong

Farid: karang kami jalan after ia jalan sama kau

Qeen: kemana?

Farid: kan ikut kali kau?

Qeen: Tanya Paes, he’s the boss

Farid: bah karang



-9.24pm-

Paes: mana kan you?

Qeen: you dimana? Ni, me sini

Paes: entrance

Qeen: me nampak you

Paes: dimana kan you?

Qeen: ni.

Paes: inda me nampak

Qeen: nampak?

Paes: bah



-9.56pm-

Qeen: sayang me lapar

Paes: bah makan lah

Qeen: malas me

*bought Yam without pearl*

Paes: bah lajutah makan, you lapar

Qeen: makan di west street saja, me ngidam buttermilk chicken



-10.37pm-

Paes: you makan apa?

Qeen: you mahu makan apa?

Paes: yang hariatu you ordered kan me ah

Qeen: JUL! menu.

Paes: ice milo Satu

Qeen: onion rings, buttermilk chicken without rice, indomee satu

Paes: beparut tah jua banar you ani

Qeen: sama air suam ah

*ignore Paes*



-10.46pm-

Qeen: you, me lapar

Paes: lagi?



-10.55pm-

*at Pasar Malam, Gadong*

Qeen: nyaman eh cocktailnya

Paes: rasa eh

*he drank my cocktail pfft*

Peej: aku mahu beli nasi tapi mahu mee jua eh macam nyaman tongkengnya atu lai

Paes: apakan

Qeen: baik semua di gasa

Paes: you, belikan me air grape uh

*he gave me a dollar*



-11.22pm-

Paes: mana you baby?

Qeen: kan baliktah ni, kan ke JP pulang

Paes: behapa?

Qeen: makan

Paes: lagi?



-12.23am-

Qeen: baru me balik

Paes: oh

Qeen: mana during Farid?

Paes: di bilik, me di luar

Qeen: pukul berapa you tidur ni?

Paes: tunggu during balik

Qeen: bah me tidur

Paes: ily

Qeen: you too, night



-04.48am-

Paes: you, ada you online email me tadi kah?

Qeen: mmm

Paes: you?

Qeen: mmm

Paes: ui

Qeen: aaaaaah?

Paes: ada you online email me?

Qeen: tidur me

Paes: tadi ada email me online sekali me text pakai email Farid, lepasatu di leftnya

Qeen: mmm

Paes: kalau you, tahu jua me kalau you makai. You reply mun si Farid text

Qeen: mmm

Paes: me fikir you

Qeen: karang me tukar password you

Paes: bah tukarkan lah

Qeen: karang lah kan tidur jua me ni

Paes: bah I love you

Qeen: mmm I love you too



-08.17am-

Paes: sayang lain rasa me, I love you wah

*I didn’t reply his message, aku tidur sorry*



-09.11am-

Paes: I’m off to sleep by now. Inda nyaman rasa me. I’m being all good tadi inda gauk. Sayang you should know that you’re the only one that reign my heart. There can be no others cause I forbid them no others to steal my heart after its yours. I love you so much and I felt completed as you’re around and being mine. Escaping from me will be your biggest mistake because there can be no other that will love you as pure as mine. Nurashikin Jamil, you’re mine that I love. Message me when you bangun, I’m off to bed. Sincerely yours, your baby. I wanted to meet you so bad.

*I didn’t reply lagi pasal aku nyaman tidur and hp ku silent*



-01.05pm-

I’d got woke up and check the phone.

Seven new messages eight missed calls.

Baca messages.

Smiled.

Hyper.

Tidur semula.


i'm Emaroartha's ♥ 2:04 PM

eat eat eat eat eat eat eat mahu makan lagi :s

We went to The Express Tutong sekejap pasal lapar? We didn’t know mahu makan mana earlier. Mahu Aminah Arrif and makan ambuyat. I don’t eat ambuyat pulang but Peej yang berlanja so yea ikut saja tia haha. But abang adlee said alangalang us bertiga saja makan so we decided to pergi Express saja. Save budget? Err. I ordered chicken pie saja pasal that’s the only food yang aku suka di Express? Peej cakap aku kapih iatah makan chickenpie saja. Pak! See itu kacang hiju, I don’t eat those. Membagi brain damage :s


And Peej took a picture of me and abang adlee. Which is “membagi malu” iatah us usul inda ikhlas bergambar plus ada unwanted people behind us HAHA!


Abang adlee brought us to Seri Kenangan Beach pasal we wore shades tadi. Apakan? And I scratched his name on to the sand which makes me wheee lawa ehhh! [:




i'm Emaroartha's ♥ 6:54 PM








and i love him for his insanity [:

i'm Emaroartha's ♥ 6:15 PM

my second of july

Good morning and it’s 10.09am? I slept around 4.30am last night or I should say this morning? Pfft. I can’t sleep and yes I struggled myself to sleep so I went outside to take some fresh air err I can call not-so-fresh air haha I joke I joke! I asked Peej to accompany me and sat on the verandah and she did. Its cold out there and none of things on the road on that time. Obviously. Peej and I listened to some sort of sad songs, which is lame. What is wrong with me sometimes? I’ve got what I want but something’s missing, I’m not sure what it is but every time I look to the skies with full of diamonds on it, I felt like I missed something. There I am, my emo feeling’s came. I don’t mind, it’s just a feeling.

It’s almost five and Peej still busy with the laptop and msn. I’m off to bed and thoughts of my past. It’s just a little replay that I usually thought of before I went to bed. It took a couple of hours for me to think about it back; sometimes it took for more than a couple of hours.

I stared the bedroom’s ceiling

I smiled

And sigh

The question is,

Am I picking the right choice?

Or it’s just a feeling

Feeling of losing

Something that’s really beautiful

Wonderful

Naaah it’s just a feeling

A feeling that

I don’t even know

Let God do the job

Sometimes words

Spoken

Came out from the mouth

And it’s meaningless, sometimes

But when I say I miss you

I really do

Again, I’m talking in circles

Sigh

See! I wrote in trash again grr. i listened to Selwyn-Negative Things and it reminds me of my mummy. I don’t know why I thought of her. I feels like I don’t even know her since she’s not with us for about three months. last week, she went home for a while saja and we didn’t talk as much as we used to before. I admit it, I miss you since the morning you made a cup of hot milk and kissed me on my cheek before I’m off to school.



I miss your scent. The white perfume bottle of yours, still I remember its smell. Tears easily run down on my face when it comes to “replay” thingy. This is what I hate much, when nobody’s understand how I felt. I live with fear. Phobia keeps following and sticks with me since I was 5, it won’t go. I knew it. Someone who I adore a lot told me, learned the lesson and don’t do the same mistakes that they did to you. I take her as my superwoman, she really are. I don’t know what will happen to me without her.

As the first daughter, I should take a good care of Peej Zeel. I know, they keep reminds me this. I’m trying, trying to be a good big lazy ass sister for them. I teach I yelled I laugh I slap and I’m sorry. That’s it, enough talking craps. Feel so good to let this all out from this cold heart.







Truthfully, Qeen





i'm Emaroartha's ♥ 9:57 AM


Tasting the raindrops

Looking in your eyes
I feel myself falling in love with you
You said I love you
And I said it too

We went to our very own special spot
For no real reason at all
We sat and talked and looked at one another
And then the rain began to fall

We could have left just as quick as we came
But no, you wanted to stay in the rain
You asked me a question I
ll never forget
Have you ever tasted the raindrops?

I looked at you funny and you gave me a sigh
the cutest look, as I wondered, why?
Why, did you ask me to taste the rain?
Well, what did have to loose or gain?

I watched you with a careful eye
And did the same as you
You were looking up at the cloudy sky
But my eyes were stuck on you like glue

I lifted my head to look at the sky
And closed my eyes really tight
Just as I thought I
d caught a raindrop
You suddenly held me tight

I opened my eyes with slight alarm
As you kissed me soft and sweet
I remember that kiss like it was yesterday
I still feel those raindrops on my cheek

I tasted the raindrops like I never had before
It was worth every second of bliss
Every time I think of that moment
I think of my raindrop kiss

We sat close together on that one special rock
And we held each other tight
Then almost as suddenly as it came
The sun came out from beneath the rain

The most beautiful colors I
ve ever seen
Came out on the western sky
The sun was setting and the moment was perfect
More than any money could buy

As the sun slowly set and the sky lit up
You began carving our names in our special rock
I told you I would never forget this moment
In my heart this memory is locked

As our names were finished and permanently engraved
We watched the sun finish its day
We slowly got up to leave this place
Which was a year ago this May

I haven
t been to that spot in a year
Where did all the time go?
I will visit this place alone this time
And I will finally have to let go

This memory will be in my heart forever
But you will not remain in my mind
I don
t know if that love, will be seen again
For that love I cannot find

I will go to this spot as we promised we would
But you will not be there this time
Why is it that you can
t keep your promise?
I know that I
m keeping mine

Never again will I taste the raindrops
The way I did with you
And when I go to this spot again
I will say goodbye to you.


i'm Emaroartha's ♥ 9:54 AM

carwash carwash uuu-whee-uuu-whee



-masuk bilik, dari toilet-

qeen: haha hihi ho hi ha hi hu! *repeat*
abang adlee menantang and peej terdiam
peej: kenapa kan kau Lai?
qeen: jobless wah ku! abang adlee, ada kerja kah kan di buat?
abang adlee diam and keep stared at me

qeen: cuci kereta eh
abang adlee: bah lakastah
qeen: bisaibisai wah?
abang adlee: bah awu
*abang adlee tukar baju and bagi ketiak pengharum*

peej: hp mu Lai bawa
*downstairs*
qeen: banyak kan di cuci ni eh, buat business carwash eh

abang adlee: awu ramai lelaki menghantar kereta ni mun kamu pekerja ku
qeen: buat lah, Q&P's bikini carwash
peej: babi tah kali
*i'm wet! kena siram*
abang adlee: kenapa kau basah Lai?

qeen: obviously! siapatah menyiram aku baru ani?
abang adlee: membersihkan kau ataupun kereta ku ni?
qeen: indatah payah ku mandi ni ah

peej: LAIIIIII HPMU BASAH
qeen: manis




tapikan, bersih jua bah the car pasal abang adlee pakai sabun pencuci piring untuk mencuci keretanya manatahkan jua bersih berkilat tu?

*kereta bersih*
qeen: bah kereta siapa lagi? cuci kereta mama eh
abang adlee: eh mulai ku
qeen: membagi lapar jua ah. ani baru percutian sehat namanya
*straight to the kitchen, meratah and menikmati hidangan*





i'm Emaroartha's ♥ 7:39 PM


and welcome to the world Peej since you're new in blogging la la la
and this is her blog, click this heart of mine for her

i'm Emaroartha's ♥ 1:21 PM



The sunlight is as passionate as flowers
bordering the sidewalk of a song.
Clouds shape its golden apertures for hours,
Shifting with each breeze that comes along.
The day becomes a mustard-colored sunbeam
falling through the window of your smile.
Mystical sensations, headed downstream,
Sit upon your windowsill awhile.
How beautifully the choir of the mountains
sings to its rapt audience of blue!
As dancing down a corridor of fountains,
We toss in coins and make this wish for you
Long may you love the loveliness of Earth!
And celebrate with joy your day of birth.

and it's 1st July honey(:


Qeen



i'm Emaroartha's ♥ 12:51 AM

purple teardrops i cried

Tick tock tick tock!

Waiting waiting and waiting kena pick.

La la la la la la la

I fell asleep.

A hour passed, my phone’s ranged.

Message, “bah get ready baby”

Finally!

OUT


i'm Emaroartha's ♥ 1:13 AM

birthday birthday, abang adleehuthawt

It's your birthday, so don't feel down
don’t think bad stuff and frown
your life should be filled with mirth
Just look what you've done since your birth.

You started out really small,
now you're really filled out and tall.
In the beginning you would just cry,

now you can laugh if you try.

You've done quite well since your start,
So as you grow older take heart
Keep up the good work and don't be a jerk
Stay happy being an old fart *peace*



29th June 2009




i'm Emaroartha's ♥ 11:49 AM

i'm not broken(:


Let You Know That I Admire What You Do
The More If I Need To Reassure You, My Life Would Be Purposeless Without You
If I Want It
When I Ask You
You Inspire Me To Be Better
You Challenge Me For The Better
Sit Back And Let Me Pour Out My Love Letter

Baby I'm Yours I Want To Cater To You Boy

Let Me Cater To You
Cause Baby This Is Your Day
Do Anything For My Man
Baby You Blow Me Away
Inspire Me From The Heart,
Can't Nothing Tear Us Apart
You're All That I Want In A Man
I Put My Life In Your Hands

I'll Keep Myself Up
Remain The Same Chick
You Fell In Love With
I'll Keep It Tight, I'll Keep My Figure Right
I'll Keep My Hair Fixed, Keep Rocking The Hottest Outfits
When You Come Home Late Tap Me On My Shoulder, I'll Roll Over
Baby I Heard You, I'm Here To Serve You
If It's Love You Need, To Give It Is My Joy
All I Want To Do, Is Cater To You Boy

I Love The Way You Are
Fulfill Your Every Desire
Your Wish Is My Command
I Want To Cater To My Man
Your Heart
So Pure Your Love Shines Through
The Darkness We'll Get Through
So Much Of Me Is You
I Want To Cater To My Man


Emaroartha's


i'm Emaroartha's ♥ 11:12 AM

bloody romantic sinner

Beautiful cold night sends me serenity.
Admiring the beauty of nature.
The desire is growing in me to dance in this divine rapture.
The music is playing in my fragile heart.
Every rhythm turns into melody and it’s ekes with glee in every wound in my soul.

Oh how I long this passion.
I am falling into my deepest fear.
Enjoying shattering my dreams.
I am drowning into gloom.
Seeking for more ache.

Deep silence is devouring me depth.
Tired to hide myself in the dark.
Can’t wake up from this despair.

Too lost in own imaginary world.
Save me from myself.
Afraid to lose control again.
Set me free I am so tired to live in illusions.
Hold me I will be resurrection in your arms.

I am walking through the darkness.
Lost voices are calling me to taste own sins.
They bless me with their venom touch.
Bloody romantic sinner I have become.
Blinded by own obsession as I drunk my last weep.
Whispers of my ghost is slowly fading away.

Lacuna kissed my doom.
Enshrine became my grave.
Leaving every taint of sorrow on my epitaph.
I let the drop of my blood bled in my grace.
Let me sleep in pacify.
I long for deep sleep.
Don’t wake me up when reaper knocked on my door.
I am ready to be sacrifice and bloody romantic sinner for the abyss.

There’s no cure for me.
There’s no immortality for my sanity.
I am just the bloody romantic sinner.

Emaroartha’s


i'm Emaroartha's ♥ 12:12 AM